Hey Drama Goblins,
I had a long post almost almost ready to go, but it's not quite ready. There are few more things to say.
I’d planned to finish it tonight, but today felt like I lived three lives by 5:00. All good stuff. And there was a lot of it.
Then I spent the evening with a dear friend. We were way overdue for a one-on-one reconnect.
She just left my house and instead of opening the laptop and pushing through to finish the story, I'm prioritizing rest and sleep and reflection on the events of this remarkable day.
And yet, I couldn't not share something on a Wednesday.
I can bend a self-imposed rule, but I can't bring myself to break it.
I’m so glad you’re here,
Lara
Before I let you go…
I know my posts about men and dating apps don’t sit well with everyone. I know - because they have told me - that I have lost the esteem and respect of those whose esteem and respect I aspire to earn.
That’s on me.
I make my choices and accept the consequences.
Sometimes I stick to my guns, sometimes I learn, grow, change, and apologize.
And, at the risk of sounding too… something, I don’t just do it for me and my community of like-minded women.
Every time I swipe, snicker, and snark, I say what may be my version of a prayer for the vast majority of women throughout the vast majority of human history who couldn't.
I honor the women who had/have no choice but to marry men like that for their survival. Who couldn’t/can’t leave those marriages for their children’s survival. Who spent/spend their lives in servitude and silence.
How very, very rare it has been until very, very recently for women to make fully informed choices about their partners because they were not fully allowed to be themselves.
How even in 2024, enough of a system is still in our culture that some couch-fucking douchebag can sling “childless cat lady” with confidence that it will land with enough people to be an effective insult.
In the last 24 hours, we have seen a huge percentage of our country overjoyed with the pick of Tim Walz for VP. A poster child for non-toxic masculinity. A mensch among mensches.
The kind of man who uses well-placed snark and snickering to great effect. The kind of man whose respect and esteem I aspire to earn.
I’d like to think of myself as childfree rather than childless
The kind of man who reflects how well a woman chooses!